Sent

May 8, 2012

I am in this group — It’s kind of like a mentoring group. I posted a blog post about it here.

In my group we’ve been discussing being ambassadors of Christ. Being an ambassador had all these epic characteristics and we went around the room and named the characteristics we each felt described us and then what we felt described eachother.

I chose the following three characteristics that I felt described me — Protect, Influence, Promote ( All things I can walk out in my own strength ). After breaking down what we all felt , my beautiful prophetic friend Brannen very casually told me I was by passing the characteristic that truly described who I was — She said Chari, “You’re Sent”.

Of course I did what I usually do when someone see’s through my Bull. I cried. Shhhh don’t tell anyone but I am a closet crier.

—– HONEST CONFESSION
OMG this means I am not only following Jesus as a servant but I am now walking with him as a friend. I don’t have many friends. If you make it into my inner circle it’s kind of like a gang there is no jumping you out. And if the relationship is broken in anyway It takes A LONG time for me to trust you again. — Being a friend ( an intimate ) of Jesus means my relationship with Him reaches a deeper level. I’ve never been comfortable with that kind of stuff, the messy stuff. Intimacy is messy and there are no secrets, I am exposed! But mostly Intimacy means total trust. [highlight] I have trust problems. [/highlight] I have this scar that has healed but still hurts and it’s from people I trust that have failed me. Being sent means I have to totally trust with God regardless of how I feel or what I see. This brings my trust issues to the forefront. Walking in the other stuff I felt described me is easy. It’s trusting God with the other stuff so he can send me off that holds me captive. I like the other stuff. I don’t have to trust him to feel like a protector, or be influential, or to promote a cause. I can do that in my own strength. [highlight] Being sent means having to give up the things I have stitched into my soul that I have allowed to cast my identity and now I MUST let only God be what is seen and what Identifies me.[/highlight]

…being sent means the ultimate form of trust — It means action.  Being sent means HE TRUSTS ME enough to be a vessel for Him.

Humbled,
Charise

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